


“I wasn’t high, Oli. I was traumatised.”

by happyxwalsh



Series: Season 3 [12]
Category: How to Get Away with Murder
Genre: M/M, Mentions of Suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-06
Updated: 2019-02-06
Packaged: 2019-10-23 09:23:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 493
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17680766
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/happyxwalsh/pseuds/happyxwalsh
Summary: Connor tells Oliver what he was traumatised by.





	“I wasn’t high, Oli. I was traumatised.”

Ever since Oliver slipped out that he thinks Connor is damaged, their relationship has been more strained than ever. After that night they had the fight, Connor acted like Oliver didn’t exist- mainly because he knew that if he got a good look at his face he could tell that he spent the night heavily crying.

As the rest of the week moved on, he gradually stopped ignoring him and began the snide comments. The law student knows that this isn’t the healthiest way to deal with his problems, but he figures that if he’s so damaged then what’s the issue? 

Oliver couldn’t help but hate himself for hurting Connor even more than he already did before. The law student went from missing him profusely to hating him in such a short amount time. And all the hacker can do about it is watch his ex boyfriend move further and further away from him, and then maybe slowly put the pieces of their relationship back together.

Or possibly not, based on the fact that the younger man is getting drunk and forgetting all about his problems with champagne. ‘ _Shit. Him hating me is something that I can handle, but there’s no way I’m letting him risk relapsing.’_

“Hey, do you think it’s a good idea for you to be getting waste?”

“Yeah, why? You have a problem with it?”

“No, not for me, but I vaguely remember you showing up on my doorstep; messed up the night of the bonfire with a substance abuse problem.”

“You’re cute,” Connor smiles, with a small breathy laugh.

“What?”

“You bought that.”

“What is that supposed to mean?”

“I wasn’t high, Ollie. I was traumatised.”

“Traumatised from what?”

“I witnessed someone get murdered,” Oliver’s mouth fell open, shocked at what Connor just admitted to him. 

“What?” He whispers, trying to hide the terror in his voice. 

“It was Sam Keating, and it’s all Wes’ fault. He forced us to help him deal with the problem he made, nothing new there.”

“Oh my g-“

“You know, sometimes, I just think that it would be so much easier to end it all. At least then I wouldn’t have to live with any of this anymore,” The hacker’s throat tightened, how did he miss how badly Connor was hurting? 

“Hey, don’t say things like that. I hate the idea of you feeling that way,” he softly speaks, gently putting a comforting hand on Connor’s shoulder.

“Don’t. I’m scared to open up, like you said... You really wouldn’t like the _real_ me. I don’t,” the law student mutters, before walking off and leaving Oliver to hate himself a little bit more than before. Connor didn’t deserve to feel that way. Sure, he can be an asshole sometimes but deep down it’s just a defence mechanism and he’s simply scared and vulnerable. 

Oliver wants nothing more than to make him happy, especially after that conversation. 

‘ _He deserves so much better than this.’_

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you enjoyed! Sorry I’m not the best at sticking to a schedule.


End file.
